Giving It to You Raw

Bite me.

Razor.

Please?

I feel so pitiful. Right now my crying sounds like Hinata's when she was fighting Neji Right before she remembers her "ninja way". Only I don't have a ninja way. I'm just a normal teenage girl in the 21st century who's fucking messed up in the head. Like I feel like a fucking crazy person. Or a druggie going through withdrawls. I'm up and down on this roller coaster ride from hell. It's never over. Right when It's going steady for a while it plummets. Like this week I was having a really high high. I fell in love with life again. But now I feel as though the earth was swept from beneath me, and I'm in a hell of my own making. I feel fucking sick. Like I should be locked away. Like I should be quarentined. I wanna fucking cut so fucking bad, but I can't because they're always watching me. They study me like a damn lab monkey, waiting for me to mess up, making premeditated plans for when I do. Because I always do. Time and time again. Because I'm a fucking screw up. I always will be. So FML. Even if it gets better than it is now, life always sucks like a prostitute in the end.

But the razor won't cut.

Cuz I can't.

Fall into that shit again.

I'm screwed up enough as it is.